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So I stand at the threshold of another crossroad. And I find myself struggling with this new avenue. I want to jump up and fight for my rights. I’m fearful of the future. Worst case scenarios crowd my mind and I feel life slipping out of my control. Fear and anger take over and I righteously claim mine. I’m protecting what belongs to me – so I can’t be wrong, right? Then why is there no peace? Only fear and worry? “Lord”, I pray, half-heartedly. “Why are You asking me to do this? It’s unfair!” Deep down, I don’t really want any answers. Just a good fight and a chance to claim my just dues and be proved right! But thankfully He loves me too much to leave me in misery. “ Seek Me and live *,” He said. “How Lord,” I cried. “What should I do?” So He led me to this passage from the book Gold By Moonlight by Amy Carmichael. Based on the verse below, this is what she writes – “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in t...

I had thought there must be some redeeming quality in me. Some talent or ability that made me useful to God, my family and society; that provided a reason for my very existence. Yet as I read Paul’s second epistle to the Corinthians, a different idea was pushed into my consciousness. “Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think of anything as being from ourselves, but our sufficiency is from God.” In a way, this is connected with my acceptance of His grace. It took me a while to acknowledge my complete and absolute unworthiness and realise that He loved me inspite of it. Unbelievable but true! But admitting that my sufficiency – all I am and who I wanted to be – was only in Christ, went a step further. I’d never understood what the nailing of the self meant, till I saw this verse with new eyes. I had accepted the fact of my unworthiness but it didn’t stop there. Some painful digging into my soul had to be done till I realised that my sense of self-worth came in believing tha...

Dear Diary, Finished reading Battlefield Of The Mind * tonight. Couple of things stuck though. 1. Patience is not the ability to wait but to have a good attitude while waiting. 2. Pride vs. Humility: Pride says, “I’m ready now. I don’t need to wait any more. Why is it taking so long?” Humility says, “God truly knows best and I’ll trust Him to bring it to pass in His time. He is never late.” Which just goes to show how way off the mark I was! But lessons learnt are always a good thing – however late in the day! * Battlefield Of The Mind by Joyce Meyer