inkhorn

Frankly, I am not enjoying this process! Fear has not been conquered and worry has not been vanquished. My immediate reaction was to unworthily fling back my Father’s love in His face and weep uncontrollably. I find that this lack of control over my life has left me demoralized. I am an easy prey to the most stupid thoughts. And perhaps, not knowing in my lifetime, is too hard a price. I want to rail against the unfairness of it all. But Lord, as I stand, smack in the middle of another storm, the saving grace is that You are with me. For the moment, that is enough.

I heard a song a while back. The words are given below. And it got me thinking. We pray for blessings We pray for peace Comfort for family, protection while we sleep We pray for healing, for prosperity We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering All the while, You hear each spoken need Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things 'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops What if Your healing comes through tears What if a thousand sleepless nights   Are what it takes to know You’re near What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise We pray for wisdom Your voice to hear And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love As if every promise from Your Word is not enough All the while, You hear each desperate plea And long that we'd have faith to believe When friends betray us When darkness seems to win We know that pain reminds this heart That this is not, this is not our hom...

“Calm me, O Lord, as You stilled the storm, Still me, O Lord, keep me from harm, Let all the tumult within me cease, Enfold me, Lord, in You peace.” -           Celtic Traditional So being confined to the bed with a broken ankle can be very illuminating in many aspects. In terms of experiencing enforced rest for one. Also being treated like a queen helps, no end! Apart from the usual cribbing and discomfort, the past four weeks have been fun too. (Yes, I did say ‘fun’ and I have not lost my marbles!) MD, long-sufferingly, has been waiting on me hand and foot and making me innumerable cups of tea! (Yes, he is a sweetheart and I love him very much!) Apart from all that, it’s also given me time to just chill (to borrow from a young cousin’s vocabulary!) with God. By no means have the winds died down. There are still times when I just want to throw it all up. But since I can’t walk off anywhere (literally!), it’s helped ...